Fuck Off, Judge

Bollocks to the Supreme Court, I say. These moronic and totalitarian judges, agents of the Total Chacha State, have ruled that we Indians do not have a fundamental right to sell liquor. Indeed, they say, it is the fundamental right of the Total Chacha State to “license” this activity, via its viciously corrupt excise department.

It must be easy to pass such a ruling sitting in New Delhi, where Shiela Dixit’s CONgress government monopolises the retail trade of alcohol. These judges, ensconced in their Lutyens’ bungalows, should look around this vast sub-continent.

Take Goa, for instance, where I have been residing for over five years now. The cashew season is on – and this means that most country Goans will be distilling urak, the first distillate of feni, inside their own homes. I will be buying gallons of this unbranded urak for myself. It is a great drink. Try to stop it – and there will be a revolution, Mr. Judge.

Similarly, take the Maoist-Naxal badlands, where the tribals distil mahua from a jungle flower of the same name. This is traditional knowledge – and mahua is an excellent drink that could easily rival Mexican tequila in the international market. But it is illegal. Want to placate the tribals who are up in arms? You must liberate mahua from the Total Chacha State.

My advice: Break the back of the stupid and totalitarian Supreme Court of India. Break every excise rule. Sell liquor illegally in New Delhi itself – and many do so, especially in the slums. Now do it in the restaurants. Do it in the grocery shops. Ask paanwallahs to sell pints. Ask chaiwallahs to sell whiskey. Ask the soft drink wallahs to stock chilled beer. Ask the Tibetans to sell chhung with their momos.

All this points to the huge amount of ignorance within the Total Chacha State. I have an earlier post on our “illiterate bar.” It is from this illiterate bar that illiterate judges are selected. What else can we expect? Another reason to reject the Right to Education Bill that Chacha Manmohan S Gandhi is currently trumpeting. It will only be miseducation. It will only worsen our plight. We don't need a right to miseducation. We definitely need a right to a drink.

Civil society must also call for a complete social boycott of the excise department. These extortionists should be told to fuck off. Tear up their licenses. Don’t pay them a farthing in taxes. REVOLT!

And as far as the moronic Supreme Court of India is concerned, I have outlined the solution long ago – a “private law society.”

We possess the right to make and sell alcoholic drinks. Let no Chacha State take these rights away from us.